Lydia Rees

XX/XX TWENTY TWENTY Written and Published by - Lydia Rees Like every other year, another comes to an end and I’d like to think that I am a little bit wiser than the last. I know how silly and obvious it sounds but I am always shocked when I write these EOY blogs because the previous year, I thought I knew everything there was to know about. *mind blown moment* TALOFA my hunnies and welcome to the last blog post for 2020, the recap. As always, sit down, relax, grab a cuppa or a snack... and join me.  2020 was the year that undoubtedly shook the entire nation. For the past 22 years that I have been alive, I have never witnessed or been directly affected by a pandemic, it was something we only learnt about in high school text books yanno. COVID 19 (coronavirus) , as we all know, took the reins over many months. It consisted of international border closures, state border closures, gathering restrictions, social bloody distancing, unemployment skyrocketing, hundreds and thousands of people

BEFORE THE WRINKLES SET IN PLACE Written & Published by Lydia Rees Talofa hunnies. Ya girl was feeling inspired randomly in the shopping centre. So with as many typos as one can possible leave in, sit back, grab a bevvy, relax and have a read  ———————————————————————- My parents were just two middle class workers who made the brave move from Samoa to Australia in hopes for a better life for us kids. I was privileged enough to have both parents, alive and active in my life, so I know not everyone can relate. We were far from rich but also far from poor, perfectly centred at middle class. They made sure we had just enough to get by, food or none, money or none, when the sun rose and set again in the evening, we still had each other. Age 9, when my family took a trip to the beach as we often did, we reached a section of the rocks where you had to walk through a lower path of rushing water to get to the other rock. It’s harder to explain in words without a visual so bare with me. Me an

The world changed when COVID 19 made its rounds, starting in 2019 and then completely taking over 2020. What started in China soon spread everywhere across the world, affecting families, businesses, individuals and so forth. The world came to a complete standstill and we face each day knowing that years from now, this pandemic we are currently in, will be in history books. I remember first hearing about this virus going around in early March, it started out with some shared posts on social media buy my international friends, and quickly reached the ears of those in Australia. In just a blink of an eye, our nation began panic buying. Toilet paper became the center of attention, fistfights and loud verbal arguments being posted up onto social media. People turned into animals, the fight for survival. The panic buying continued to the point where shelves were now stripped of canned foods, pasta, rice, noodles and so forth. Only a month ago, this same nation outstretched their arms to th

"Cheating On Me" Written and Published by Lydia Rees The 'i love you' that is texted through to my phone sounds different. Empty. It sounds like a jumbled arrangement of characters on your keyboard, thoughtlessly ensembled and deceivingly sent. Ding, my phone tells me I have received a message from "My lover". No more do you insist on having your lover by your side to tell your secrets to or to confide in. I see more excitement in your face when you're ordering food in drive-thru than when you're looking at me. You hold my hand but no longer as an embrace but more so as a routine. Delayed and postponed plans turn into canceled plans but I  guess somewhere in my mind, I was happier when you canceled our plans because you no longer make any plans. You're busy, you're working, you're sick, you're tired but you're also lying. And I nod my head in agreement just to keep you satisfied, the same way I nod my head when you want h

It's no secret that we have all found ourselves in a dark space. in the middle of a situation completely out of our control and little to no way of getting out. trust me when I say I have witnessed first hand what is like to see suicide as a way out. I will not discriminate those we have lost to suicide by calling it an "easy way out" but that's how many people see it as. not strong enough to handle our problem. Young and with a heart freshly torn out of my chest, it hard to not let the cloud cover up any ray of sunshine. All the reasons to live have now been covered by confusion and insecurities. The feelings of not being good enough are so quick to dance around in your heard. It breaks my heart over and over again to think about my younger self who was so sure that taking my life was the only way for the pain to disappear. I remember sitting in my room with a love letter to my friends and family firmly pressed in my palm. Crying never-ending tears thinking about w

7th January 2021 I am my fathers daughter. One. I can see the image in my head. My fathers gently hand holding me whilst i blow out the one candle on an enormous cake for my first birthday. Not too far down the track, I remember my family being at the beach. There was a section between the rocks where it looked like it was impossible to cross. The tide was high and the small canal filled and crashed with water. Eager to get to the other side, my father picked me and my brother up, propped onto both sides of his waist and just...walked through. I remember looking down at the water and back up to my father, what a hero. Fifteen. That’s how old I was when I first began to understand my father’s behaviour. Old enough to understand the  consequences  of his actions, but too young to understand the  reason behind  his actions. Eighteen. My father beat me black and blue over me quitting from a toxic workplace. Accused of "giving up" but failing to understand the bullying an

As we draw near to the end of 2019, I want to recap on the past year. Things that I have learnt, experiences that I have had, moments unforgettable. I find that writing about the year I have had allows me to revisit a previous version of myself many years later. 2019 was a big year for me. Life changing. In all honesty, I did not expect this year to be anything great but God works in mysterious ways. The easiest way for me to lay out the year I had, I will list months and events that I feel are worthy of mentioning, the good the bad, the ugly. January 2019 - In early January, my cousins and siblings went on an unplanned trip to Wollongong Beach in the middle of the night. Literally, I finished work at 11pm and then we made our way. All packed into the 12 seater van off to explore the mountainous terrain of Wollongong. Later that month, I made an annual visit to the homelands Samoa. A few blissful days with my family there. Nights with my grandma. I returned from Samoa to the news o